Tag Archives: losing a mother

YOU’RE NOT THERE

Posted on December 28, 2016 by Judy

This post is named “You’re Not There” because I am sharing a very touching music video created by the very talented Lukas Forchhammer. His manager sent this to me and I wondered if perhaps it was because I have a … Continue reading →

MEMORY OF LOVE – PART 3

Posted on November 29, 2016 by Judy

The feelings brought up by this were familiar ones. I was never religious the way my mother wanted me to be and I felt badly that I disappointed her. The fact that she was gone didn’t change that.
Miriam held my hands and looked into my teary eyes and told me, “Judy, you were there for your mom while she was alive. Everyone at the nursing home was amazed by your love and devotion. Did you know they still remember you and always ask me how you are doing?” Continue reading →

Tagged acknowledging grief, acoustic guitar, adjusting from grief, beautiful music, Caregiving, comforting music, composing, creativity, dealing with dementia, death, dementia, dementia in mother, expressing feelings, grief, grief and healing, Grief descriptions, grief over losing a parent, GRIEF RELATED, guitar, healing and grief, healing from grief, healing music, hope, hope for healing, hope of healing, I just pretend, I've lost you somewhere, Insight Timer, inspiration, Judy Unger, losing a mother, loss, love, love and memories, lovesong, lyric composiiton, lyric composing, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, meditation songs, Memory of Love, mother, mother daughter relationship, mother's illness, Music, music and healing, musical comfort, musician, optimism after loss, original songs, overcoming grief, performing, Set you free, singing, songwriting | 2 Comments

MEMORY OF LOVE – PART 2

Posted on December 10, 2015 by Judy

It took a lot of bravery to experience watching my mother decline. I have so many lovely memories. They are the ones that help me overcome my grief and sadness. Continue reading →

Posted in Healing and Hope | Tagged acknowledging grief, acoustic guitar, adjusting from grief, beautiful music, Caregiving, comforting music, composing, creativity, dealing with dementia, death, dementia, dementia in mother, expressing feelings, grief, grief and healing, Grief descriptions, grief over losing a parent, GRIEF RELATED, guitar, healing and grief, healing from grief, healing music, hope, hope for healing, hope of healing, I just pretend, I once felt that way, I've lost you somewhere, inspiration, Judy Unger, losing a mother, loss, love, love and memories, lovesong, lyric composiiton, lyric composing, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, Memory of Love, mother, mother daughter relationship, mother's illness, Music, music and healing, musical comfort, musician, optimism, optimism after loss, original songs, overcoming grief, performing, singing, songwriting, staying positive, writing, you carried me | 6 Comments

I CAN’T TELL YOU

Posted on September 28, 2014 by Judy

At my last hypnotherapy session, I opened up to talk about the guilt I’ve carried for many years over disappointing my mother because I wasn’t an observant Jew like she was. Continue reading →

Tagged "sandwich generation", acoustic guitar, adjusting to divorce, aging mother, changing your life, child's death, childhood memories, composing, Confusion about religion, coping with divorce, creativity, death of a child, dementia, dementia in mother, gray divorce, grief bereavement "Loss of a Child", grief over losing a parent, guilt, guilt and religion, guitar, healing music, Hypnotherapy, inspiration, Judy Unger, losing a mother, loss, lovesong, lyric composiiton, lyric composing, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, memories, mother, mother daughter relationship, mother's illness, Music, musician, new floor, not being observant, optimism, original songs, performing, powerful mother, religion, religious guilt, singing, songwriting, spiritual confusion, writing | 4 Comments

MY MOTHER, MY SONG

Posted on October 23, 2013 by Judy

In Hebrew, my mother’s name Shirley means my song. My mother was an exquisite song in my life. She is a magnificent melody that I will continue humming until the day I die.
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Tagged "sandwich generation", acceptance of loss, Aging Parents, belief in God, Caregiving, composing, creativity, death, dementia, dying experience, dying mom, dying mother, eulogy for a mom, Eulogy for mother, faith in God, finding faith, funeral for a mom, grief, grief bereavement "Loss of a Child", GRIEF RELATED, guitar, inspiration, inspiring, Judy Unger, letting go, losing a mother, loss, loss of a mom, loss of a mother, love for a mother, love never dies, lovesong, loving mom, loving mother, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, mom's death, mother, mother and sadness, mother daughter relationship, mother dying, mother with dementia, mother's death, mother's funeral, mother's illness, Mother's love, music healing, original songs, Set you free, singing, songwriting, strong mother, touching, tribute to my mother, You Were There | 4 Comments

ONE DAY, YOUR PAIN WILL GO AWAY – PART 2

Posted on October 13, 2013 by Judy

I was so relieved that my mother’s suffering was finally over. Music was God’s gift to lift me up. Today, God was with my mother and me. Continue reading →

Tagged "sandwich generation", acceptance of loss, Aging Parents, Caregiving, composing, creativity, death, dementia, dying experience, dying mom, dying mother, grief, grief bereavement "Loss of a Child", GRIEF RELATED, guitar, inspiration, inspiring, Judy Unger, letting go, losing a mother, loss, loss of a mom, loss of a mother, love for a mother, love never dies, lovesong, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, mother, mother and sadness, mother daughter relationship, mother dying, mother with dementia, mother's death, mother's illness, Mother's love, Music, music healing, Ordinary Life, original songs, Set you free, singing, songwriting, touching, tribute to my mother, with me, writing | Leave a comment

ONE DAY, YOUR PAIN WILL GO AWAY – PART 1

Posted on October 12, 2013 by Judy

I had prayed my mother would die in her sleep. This was the same horror show I saw when my father died. Why, why, why? Why does a person have to suffer dying when there are such humane alternatives? Continue reading →

Tagged "sandwich generation", acceptance of loss, Aging Parents, Caregiving, composing, creativity, death, dementia, grief, grief bereavement "Loss of a Child", GRIEF RELATED, guitar, inspiration, Judy Unger, letting go, losing a mother, loss, loss of a mom, loss of a mother, love for a mother, love never dies, lovesong, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, mother, mother and sadness, mother daughter relationship, mother dying, mother with dementia, mother's death, mother's illness, Mother's love, Music, Ordinary Life, original songs, singing, songwriting, tribute to my mother, writing | Leave a comment

I SEARCHED FOR A SMILE

Posted on October 3, 2013 by Judy

I bent close to my mother’s face. I clutched her hands and they were soft and warm. It was just the two of us. But we were not really alone. I felt the presence of death and so did my mother. I put my head against her cheek and she slowly mouthed a kiss upon me. I began to cry. Continue reading →

Tagged acceptance of loss, acoustic guitar, Aging Parents, Caregiving, composing, death, dementia, grief, GRIEF RELATED, guitar, inspiration, letting go, losing a mother, loss, loss of a mom, love for a mother, love never dies, lovesong, lyric development, lyric writing, lyrics, Miriam, More Than You Know, mother, mother and sadness, mother daughter relationship, mother dying, mother with dementia, mother's illness, Mother's love, Music, Ordinary Life, original songs, singing, songwriting, tribute to my mother, writing | 1 Comment

DANCE OF DEMENTIA, PART 2

Posted on November 6, 2010 by Judy

I used to notice when my mother said things that were “off the wall.” Now I tend to find myself noticing statements of her awareness instead. I find myself saying, “Wow, she is still on the ball with that remark!”
And so it is, that more often than not, she is not “on the ball.”
My new, lyric rhymes might be:
She not “on the ball”
Her statements are “off the wall!”
I started this post-name as: “I Miss the Way You Used to Be.”
But the “dance of dementia” continues for me.
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Tagged "sandwich generation", acoustic guitar, Aging Parents, Caregiving, dementia, elderly mother issues, guitar, losing a mother, mental decline, mother, mother daughter relationship, mother's illness, Music, Ordinary Life, original songs, performing, songwriting | Leave a comment

MEMORY OF LOVE-PART 1

Posted on September 29, 2010 by Judy

I drove home after recording my song. As I drove home, I listened to my song and cried.
Music and lyrics need to combine together like a marriage. When I heard the chords for one of my old songs – I new in my heart that fresh lyrics would bring it to life. I also knew exactly what I was going to write about.

At first, I felt sad to give up the beautiful lyrics that Cheryl had written for me. It was actually very difficult for me to sing her words without crying. Now these words are no different!
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