Tag Archives: high school memories

I’VE ALWAYS CARED-PART 2

It has been fun to revisit my older songs. With a remake, they have come to life again. I composed my song “I’ve Always Cared” when I was 19 years old. Who was I singing to? Who am I singing to now? Continue reading

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YOU’RE NOT THE ONE – PART 2

I realize that I had no idea what it meant to find “the one.” I married when I was twenty and until this year I never lived on my own. I am certain I was far too young to have gotten married. I stayed married when the odds were against it. I stuck with my decision for 31 years and celebrate the beautiful children that my husband and I created together. Continue reading

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LOVE WILL GUIDE MY WAY

I knew this was your one-year anniversary and meant to write to you sooner. You made it through one year and that is a huge achievement. Each minute farther away from the amputation of your soul may be slow, torturous and imperceptible – but it is farther along. You will get there. You will always miss your son, but life won’t be filled with torture. Don’t give up hope. Continue reading

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I CARRIED ON

I wished I could write about the feelings. I coped as best I could, but often felt overwhelmed. It did not help that I could not see very well. The therapy of music became less so, because I began to focus on minor flaws within my song arrangements. When I listened to my recent song creations, I was amazed because I wondered how I was able to create anything while under so much stress. Continue reading

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THROUGH MY MUSIC – PART 2

As I healed and expressed myself through writing and music, I felt serene. My emotions were no longer exploding anymore. It was the intensely satisfying process of songwriting that truly healed me. I was able to easily express my deepest emotions that way; I channeled them into words and melodies. Unfortunately, some of my songs have become very personal; it is far too difficult for me to share them publicly. One day, I know I will. Continue reading

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TO SOMEWHERE UNKNOWN

Only two weeks ago, I wrote a story comparing the death of a kitten to watching my elderly father deteriorate and suffer. This past week, a different path appeared for me to take with my father.
To do nothing was simply another path I had been on that was becoming quite difficult due to my father’s suffering. When it comes to making medical decisions, I definitely use intellect and seek advice from professionals. However, in the end it is my intuition that has guided me. Continue reading

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CHILDISH DREAMS

Yesterday, I had a beautiful exchange with Joni regarding my last post. I decided to move the poem over here and share our exchanges. If I could summarize what was most meaningful for me, it would be how my friend overcame her childhood trauma. She suffered a lot as a child. Instead of dwelling on her painful memories, she moved forward. She turned her life into one filled with promise and love. There was no bitterness within her. That is a beautiful story for me. Continue reading

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WE GREW UP SO FAST

It was such a lovely morning. I was in the garden area of my mother’s nursing facility. In the cool shade, I sat with Joni, my mother and her caregiver, Miriam. I had brought along my guitar. The warmth and love between all of us bathed me. I was with three, very special women. My mother was the mainstay. I absolutely adored Miriam; her love for my mother made her like my sister. And Joni, was completely connected to me. This wonderful morning was Joni’s idea. I had asked her last week where she wanted to eat to celebrate her birthday. She said it would mean a lot for her to visit with both me and my mother instead of going out to dinner. Continue reading

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THE BEAUTY REMAINS

My songs, Memory of Love and Beside Me Always reflect this. I’ve decided my song can still be beautiful, even if the theme is repetitive. As I finished my last line of lyrics, the memories flooded back. My song was originally written about a young girl being given a seashell memento by her lover – so I thought! However, as I sang my song, I flashed back to a day at the beach with my child. He was holding a seashell to add to his collection. Continue reading

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FADING THROUGH PASSAGES OF MY LIFE

Our pictures came out well. I don’t know what I would write about as far as our evening goes. I’m good at writing about trauma, and there wasn’t anything like that going on! I think our correspondence would actually be a great thing for the blog. I am totally about sharing how human and flawed I am. I will include the part about my kids and my anguish.
Continue reading

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