myjourneysinsight

MY FAIRYTALE LIFE

Posted on May 14, 2017 by Judy

Last month, I attended my 40th high school reunion. It was one of those rare occasions where I had my hair and makeup done.

I am so blessed to be a free-lance artist. After many months without any kind of artwork, I had two large projects come in on the same day. Even though my workload was a bit intense, I finished both my jobs a few days ago and I am definitely celebrating. I leave on a trip to Alaska next week with my three adult children and wanted to finish them before then.

Despite having 11 illustrations to paint in 3 weeks, I continued creating music that I love with my new arranger. Everything we worked on just got better and better. The new arrangements were magnificent – they were beautiful symphonies I enjoyed listening to while working on my paintings.

I recently finished arrangements for “Every Season” and “Alabaster Seashell.” I am going to share them, as well as the guitar tracks that will be the basis for a new arrangement of my song “Set You Free.” When my vocals are done, I’ll post them with stories about those songs.

I named my post “My Fairytale Life” because it feels that way lately. On several occasions, I’ve had strangers come over to me and tell me I am shining and radiant with my big smile. Well – I love hearing that and have every reason to smile!

I share a link to a post I wrote four years ago where I also mention “my fairytale life.” It could be considered Part 1 of this story: MY DREAM HAS ME BLESSED.

My fairytale is all about how rediscovering music in 2010 changed my life.

Memories of trauma seldom erupt from me anymore. I embrace my past because it has led me to where I am today. All of my heartbreak has eased because of music, which envelopes my heart with joy.

Now I am going to share some recent pictures!

I am posing with Delia at the Macy’s make-up counter. She was lovely and did a great job making me up!

After my makeup session, I put on my dress in the Macy’s restroom.

I could write an entire post about my 40th high school reunion, but will sum it up.

Even though I didn’t clearly remember many of the high school attendees at the reunion, it didn’t matter. We were all connected by our memories and life experiences since then. I suddenly found I had new friends and looked forward to future lunch dates filled with reminiscing and reconnecting.

Pretty funny how everyone would bend over to check out each other’s name tags!

I like my color picture better! Who is that girl?

I was very touched when a woman told me she enjoyed reading my blog. I almost felt naked because my blog is such an honest expression of my heart and soul.

I also caught up with a few good friends I never lost touch with. We spoke about very deep subjects and the time at flew by. Soon it was time for this Cinderella to get home and focus on finishing her many paintings!

On my last post, I wrote about the wonderful App named Insight Timer where I have a large audience for my instrumental music. Every day I receive messages from people all over the world telling me how comforting my music is for them. I even had a lovely Skype conversation with a new friend in Greece whom I met through Insight Timer.

https://www.insighttimer.com/judyunger

I was very excited about meeting the CEO, Christopher Plowman and his assistant, Maddy Gerard a few weeks ago. We met for tea at a restaurant in Santa Monica named Shutters by the Beach.

Christopher and Maddy were very warm and I brought some of my artwork to share with them. I told them my story, and Christopher shared how he bought Insight Timer two years ago and the progress he had made with it since then. Now Insight Timer is the most popular free meditation site available and has close to two million meditators.

I think these pictures once again show my big smile and joy.

I especially loved when Christopher shared the Insight Timer philosophy. He said, “We do not actively promote our site. Our belief is that by putting something special out there and being open to the universe, we are hopeful people will come to us.”

Well his motto is exactly what has happened for me.

I dislike promoting my music for money. I prefer to put all of my energy into creating music that moves me; music that I love. And with my willingness to freely share my music on Insight Timer, I have found a loving audience and made wonderful new friendships.

I also find it an amazing coincidence that my blog name carries the word insight!

A few weeks after our meeting, I received a message from Maddy. She asked me if I would like to be the host for a week of meditations related to grief and healing. I would choose 6 other meditations in addition to my own for every day of the week. And the best part was that I would also have an opportunity to share a brief recording about myself.

How beautiful that I have found an ideal platform to speak about how music healed me from my grief.

These are two of my recent illustrations which will be used on yogurt labels.

Below is my correspondence with a woman I went to high school with 40 years ago. She did not attend the reunion, but sent me a message after seeing the pictures I posted on our reunion’s Facebook page. I’m excited about my new friend! (Clicking on the image makes it larger).

Posted in Insight Timer | Tagged acoustic guitar, Alabaster Seashell, arrangements, blessings, Christopher Plowman, composing, creativity, Every Season, expressing feelings, Friendship, guitar, guitar arrangements, healing, healing from grief, healing music, high school reunion, Insight Timer, inspiration, inspirational, inspirational life, Judy Unger, love, lyrics, Maddy Gerrard, meditation, meditation music, meditation songs, Music, musical inspiration, musical passion, original songs, overcoming grief, passion for music, rediscovery, Set you free, singing, songwriting, staying positive, writing | 14 Comments

OPENING UP – PART 3

Posted on April 22, 2017 by Judy

Guiding my thought processes through hypnotherapy has been “instrumental” in teaching me to live in a positive way. When my head spins with stories that aren’t helpful for me, I am constantly reframing those stories into new ones that feel better.

A few weeks ago, I felt very uninspired. I told myself that it was a long time since I had done anything creative. I hadn’t had an art assignment for months. I wished I could compose a new song or write a touching story for my blog. But instead, I was numb, closed up and kind of blah.

I was under hypnosis and searching for another way of thinking that would be more helpful. I said aloud to my therapist, Connie, “I want to be creative and inspired. I am open to it!”

And then a light bulb went off – that was it! Being open was my key.

After that session, I felt a creative rush and wrote OPENING UP- PART 2. But there was more that I saved for this Part 3.

There was a line from Don Maclean’s song “American Pie” that always hit me strongly: “The day the music died.” For me, my music died for almost 30 years. I never dreamed my songs would ever live again. But when they returned to me in 2010, I was reborn.

In 1980, I recorded 20 of my songs on a cassette tape. Thirty years later, that cassette helped me relearn my songs. I believe that explains my current passion for having my songs recorded. It is my way of keeping them alive, of having them live on.

Part 1 of this story (OPENING UP–PART 1) was written seven years ago and describes my first experience of having my music recorded and arranged by a man named George. George and I worked together on a weekly basis for five years and I amassed a large collection of arrangements.

The joy that came to me through the beautiful music George arranged helped me through the deaths of both my parents and my divorce. I was thankful for the comfort music gave me.

In some ways, the ending of my relationship with George was harder than my divorce. I didn’t believe I could ever find someone else that would understand my music the way he did.

For over a year, I recorded music at home. It was actually very beneficial to discover what it was like to be “on my own.” Although it didn’t carry the excitement I achieved while working with George, I did become much more intimately acquainted with my songs. I have 52 of them and my goal was to create a clean acoustic recording for each and every one. I have almost finished that goal.

My last project with George was a meditation album and we parted ways before the album was finished. I was very disappointed because I had only six songs, instead of the ten I planned on.

My meditation music made me sad because it reminded me of how my relationship with George ended.

Six months ago, a woman named Maddy contacted me and asked me if I’d be willing to upload my meditation music onto a site named Insight Timer. I was open to it and it was an excellent decision for me.

Suddenly, I had new friendships with people all over the world. Every day, I received touching messages and each one uplifted me. The appreciation became my fuel.

I used to bemoan all of my arrangements that lacked a good vocal. Now my unfinished arrangements found a new home on Insight Timer.

I wrote a blog story when I first joined Insight Timer and on it I shared some of the lovely messages I had received. (#538 MEMORY OF LOVE-PART 3)

A few days after that I received a message from Maddy. I couldn’t believe it – she had seen my blog story! She wrote:

“I came across your recent blog post and wanted to reach out to say how wonderful it was to read what a positive experience Insight Timer has been for you. Our CEO, Christopher, read your blog post as well and felt such a sense of joy. It captured beautifully the authenticity and kindness of the community of Insight Timer.”

I am truly living my dream. When I connect with other people through my music, I feel indescribable joy. Last week, I released the full version of my six meditation songs. On only the first day, it was played over 4,000 times!

But I prefer not to focus on how many plays I’ve gotten. Reaching even one person in a big way is much more meaningful than anything else.

Two weeks ago, Maddy contacted me. She would be in Los Angeles with Christopher and we are planning to meet in a few days. Saying I’m excited would be an understatement. I plan to take a lot of pictures and write a story afterwards.

https://www.insighttimer.com/judyunger

After moping for a year, being open is what led me to find a new arranger. I’m back in a magical place of loving the music we are creating. We’re working on our fifth song together and I plan to release an album once we’ve done ten songs. Each one is a gem and I am very involved in the arranging process. It turns out that my belief of “never finding someone else to understand my music” wasn’t true.

Did my openness after that hypnotherapy session lead to me writing a new song? It didn’t, but my longing to create new music led me to reframe my thinking.

Since I see my songs as babies, I don’t need to keep giving birth to feel fulfilled.

I get tremendous pleasure watching my songs grow and develop. My babies are growing up and I cherish each and every one!

Below is a guitar recording for my next arrangement of my song “Alabaster Seashell.” I am improving as a guitarist with my new “less is more” approach.

Alabaster Seashell Guitar arrangement in progress

Posted in Insight Timer | Tagged acoustic guitar, blessings, composing, creativity, expressing feelings, guitar, healing, healing from grief, healing music, Insight Timer, inspiration, inspirational, inspirational life, Judy Unger, lovesong, meditation music, meditation songs, Music, musical inspiration, musical passion, original songs, overcoming grief, passion for music, performing, singing, songs about love, songwriting, staying positive, writing | 8 Comments

OPENING UP – PART 2

Posted on March 30, 2017 by Judy

The aroma of jasmine has been intoxicating me this past week. Hannah, my vocal coach, took my picture in front of her home where there are many gorgeous star jasmine bushes in full bloom.

The springtime aroma and breezes inspire me. I’m going to open up this post by sharing a delicate “in progress” arrangement of my song “Every Season.” On my next post, I plan to open up more about my music and share this song as it progresses.

Click the blue links to play audio:

I’m going to move away from the topic of online dating. It was a huge thing for me to be open to dating again. After 38 years, I went on my first date with a new man I met on an online dating site. We went out twice and I enjoyed my time with him. But I’ve grown tired of looking at profile pictures and receiving strange messages. I’ve decided not to renew my dating site subscription at this time.

What really inspired me was a message I received from a fellow blogger and friend, D.D. Wood.

D.D’s blog Daily Divorce Meditations really helped me when I was going through my separation and divorce. I often left D.D. comments that reflected my fear of ever considering a new relationship.

Well, a month ago I shared with D.D. the news that I was open to dating again. I loved her response so much.

Judy, WOW!!!! I am proud! You are doing it! Getting healthy and moving forward. My mentor told me a great piece of advice: she said to go out and do all the things I loved and that by living my authentic life I would meet someone out there who loved those same things I was doing and that is exactly what happened… I met my love while walking the dog! So keep doing everything you love…. being authentic… that love is coming!

My new job will consist of more yogurt flavors like this one.

I’ll be working on a new illustration assignment soon, so I am glad I was able to post on all three of my blogs this week.

It’s been 18 months since I’ve updated my art blog, ILLUSTRATING MY LIFE. My post BEING OPEN was truly a pleasure to write.

For four years, I suffered with dry eyes. Dry eyes are very individual and every person is different. I glad I was open to trying an alternative remedy by working with a naturopathic doctor. Because many remedies set me back and irritated my eyes, that took perseverance and courage. On my Dry Eye blog, Dry Eye Diaries, my post I WAS HEALED shares hopefulness and the technique that helped me. If my story inspires or helps even one person, then I am blessed.

From the time I was married at the age of 21, I closed up with every passing year. I denied my feelings and ignored my intuition.

Once I had children, I had no time to think about how I felt. I had children with extreme challenges and lived in survival mode. I became an “advocate warrior,” which only continued when I became a caregiver for my parents.

It was opening my heart and sharing that put me on my amazing journey of insight.

One of my first blog stories was named Up and Out. At that time, I hadn’t yet found the courage to write about the death of my son, Jason. But it was after I wrote my story that I truly began to heal.

Only last month, I arranged this song. I read the lyrics at Jason’s funeral in 1992.

After my separation, I gained a lot of weight as I struggled with my dry eye condition and the guilt I felt from my divorce. Food became my friend and companion and it wasn’t a healthy relationship. I struggled to find inspiration and am so glad I was open to signing up for a medical weight loss program. I have now lost almost 40 pounds and feel so much better.

This is a before and after picture to show my weight loss.

At the age of 57, I am now able to live freely and openly. I am happier and far more peaceful than I ever imagined I could be.

Watching my children grow has been one of my greatest joys. In May, I am taking all three of my adult children on an Alaskan cruise. I planned this trip over a year ago. My brother and sister-in-law are celebrating their 25^th anniversary and we are joining them with their children. All of us are anticipating this vacation with unbelievable excitement.

My journey has taken me to such wonderful places. I smile because I hear such beautiful music wherever I am!

Click the blue link to hear a new arrangement for “Beside Me Always:”

Tagged acoustic guitar, blessings, composing, creativity, Every Season, Every Season guitar, expressing feelings, gray divorce, guitar, healing, healing from grief, healing music, inspiration, jasmine, Judy Unger, love, love heals, lovesong, lyric writing, lyrics, Music, music poetry, musical inspiration, musical passion, original songs, overcoming grief, passion for music, performing, rediscovery, singing, songs about love, songwriting, staying positive, writing | 7 Comments

I’LL PRAY THAT YOU’RE SAFE AS YOU FLY AWAY

Posted on March 9, 2017 by Judy

These lyrics from my song “Someone To Love You” were written to my children. But they definitely apply to me, too!

Link to Song Page for other stories, performance and recordings: SOMEONE TO LOVE YOU.

I share my arrangement for my song “Someone To Love You.” This song is part of my musical life as I continue having new adventures!

I am 57 and it was almost 40 years since I’d gone on a date. Looking at a dating site was one thing, but actually meeting someone was definitely out of my comfort zone. Because I felt a different energy and excitement, I decided it was good for me.

When I received a message that didn’t sound pasted and copied, I went to look at the man’s profile. He looked nice and I wrote him back. He shared his number and I decided to text him.

He started out by thanking me for texting him. Then he asked me how my day went.

I shared a few things I’d done and thanked him for asking. Except auto-correct put:

“Thanks for faking!”

I jumped when I saw that and quickly wrote, “Darn that auto-correct! I meant thanks for asking!”

He asked me how long I’d been on the dating site and I told him it was about a month. He wrote:

“I was just curious why an angel like you wasn’t picked yet. Maybe it’s my lucky month to have connected with you. Or rather, maybe all men are just blind!!”

I grinned and wrote:

“Aw, thank you! You’re sweet. I’m plain – not much into glamor! Now I’m really smiling. So many of those messages I’ve gotten are cut and pasted. You seem like a real person – a really nice person, too.

”He replied:

“You are welcome. I feel so cool that I could make you smile. That simply implies you are a very happy person yourself; as it takes just a little endeavor to make a happy person smile.”

I enjoyed texting with this man. He said nice things and sounded very interesting. His name was a little complicated because his father was Italian. He told me he loved his work; he had an engineering degree and designed custom cars.

He was a widower and we wrote about our children. It was touching when he wrote that he had decided it was time to embrace life again. It was well after midnight when I said good night. I told him I was looking forward to speaking with him the next day.

In the morning, I wrote him a message and told him when I was available to talk. In the evening I was going out with my girlfriends and wouldn’t be around. I didn’t hear anything from him until late afternoon and I told him I’d text him when I was home later in the evening.

I looked forward to seeing my friends. I waited until the other three women had ordered their food and then I dropped my bombshell. “Guess what?” I said, “You won’t believe this, but I’ve actually signed up for online dating!”

All of my friends practically jumped up. They clapped and their eyes collectively widened with surprise – they were so excited for me. It was fun to see their reaction; these were women who had seen me suffer with caregiving, raising teenagers, going through my divorce and dealing with chronic eye problems. Their love and support had helped me through all of that. Being able to share something uplifting and wonderful put me on a cloud.

I took a deep breath and said slowly, “I think I might have met someone!”

They all asked me for his name. And then they wanted to know if I had could share his picture. I went to the online dating site to find it. “He’s tall and has a warm smile,” I effused.

I drove home from the dinner grinning and not long after I got home I received emails from two of my friends. Their messages were the same.

“Watch out! There’s nothing that shows up with that guy’s name. In fact, that picture is of someone else! Red flag!”

My head was spinning. I never knew about Google reverse image search. I was very lucky to have seen my friends that night.

The next morning, I received another message from him asking how I was. I wrote: “Who are you?”

What ensued was a dialog of him trying to understand why I didn’t trust him. He was surprised that his picture was someone else’s. I suggested he try a Google reverse image search and he wrote:

“Never mind; forget about it.”

I was very naïve, for sure. Not only had I allowed myself to be duped – I showed him how he could cover his tracks better in the future.

I thanked my friends profusely. One friend, Liana, told me she was happy to shadow me on any of my future dates. I was very touched by her offer.

My other friend Patty was very worldly. I thanked her so much for watching my back and wrote an email saying:

“Patty, this has been so shocking to me – but really a necessary lesson. I was so dumb!”

Patty’s reply was wise and her message definitely helped me view my experience in a much more helpful way.

“Hi Judy, I’m so sorry this happened. I know how exciting it can be when a cute guy is interested. You are NOT DUMB! You just don’t have a whole lot of experience yet. Give it time. Continue to cast your line and go on some dates with no expectation. Just have fun. It’s nerve-wracking at first, but it’ll get easier I promise.

Pretty soon, you’ll have a load more material to blog about! Some funny… some not so funny. You’ll meet nice guys… guys who just want to get laid…guys you want to smack… and guys who might reject you. And that’s ok. Rejection is protection. ALWAYS! Just please keep in mind that you have the power. Take care Judy. Love you!

Two months later, I received a message from a man who saw my profile on a networking site. He wrote:

Hello Judy,

How are you doing today? I was actually searching for an acquaintance when I came across your profile. I must confess you are pretty and this is me being honest and not just mere flattery.You caught my eye; I am interested in communicating more and sharing more about me with you and hope to learn more about you too that is if you are single and interested in communicating further.

I do believe everything is possible if we put our mind and heart together just like I believe that good things can be found in the least places. I hope to hear from you soon. Till then stay blessed.

Warm Regards, Daniel

I replied to his message and wrote:

Hi Daniel,

Thank you for your honest and bold message – I smiled reading it. As far as your asking if I’m single – I am!

I have an open heart and am very blessed so your words rang sweetly to me. We can communicate more. I’d like to know more about you and I’m happy to answer any questions you might have.

Take care, Judy

I received a long message back from Daniel. He shared pictures and his life story. He was a widower who lost his wife and daughter in a car accident. He lived somewhere in California, but he didn’t say exactly where, so I asked him.

His next message was even longer and he didn’t answer my question. I scratched my head. Then I went and uploaded his picture to Google for a reverse image search.

Bingo! It said, “Beware of this man, he is a scammer.”

I laughed out loud! Thankfully my lessons were paying off.

But by then, I had actually met a nice man and went out on my first date in decades. It was a wonderful experience.

I am very proud that I’ve had the courage to take my chances through such a jungle of deception!