Tag Archives: death
SHARING JOY AND MY HEARTACHE, TOO
At the moment, I have a lot of creative energy devoted to many pursuits at the same time. For certain, I feel pressure to market something that I could sell, which would allow me to continue my creative pursuits. At the same time, the need for writing therapy causes me to drop everything to update my blog.
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A SOMBER, GRAY SKY DARKENS ABOVE
When I was suffering with grief, I didn’t want to hear whether anything “good” came out of a child’s death. At that moment in time, all I wanted was for him to come back to life! Feeling that something “purposeful” could come out of his death would be to acknowledge something selfish. I didn’t want to there to be any purpose or benefit to his death! It was inconceivable. Continue reading →
THE AMPUTATION OF MY SOUL, PART 2
As far as the analogy to a “car wreck” goes, unfortunately deep grief wrecks lives. I believe there is a sense of unfairness to the loss of someone that didn’t get a chance to live a full life (and that includes an infant, stillbirth, and miscarriage). Everyone dies, but when it happens before someone even had a chance to experience a full life – perhaps that is where so much of the sadness lies. However, there is certainly grief with losing anyone, even someone older. I have grieved for other things in my life besides the death of my son. With autism, there is also the issue about unfairness for the additional hurdles in life. However, I never want my scars to define me. Coping with those scars were easier for me when I became less focused on why the accident happened and more focused on how I could compensate and adjust. Unfortunately, like a car wreck – accidents happen. And there are no seatbelts for grief either!
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TO FACE WHAT THE FUTURE BRINGS
I had looked for this folder before, but never found it. I did have a few, old Compassionate Friends newsletters which I had scanned for earlier posts. I glanced quickly at the pages; some were folded and others were written in pencil and marked over. There were photocopies and poems I recognized from a long time ago.
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