I was honored recently to be featured in a local newspaper article. Performing at a Compassionate Friends candle lighting ceremony after 30 years was a very moving experience. I had no idea it would lead to an interview with a lovely journalist and this beautiful write up.

I have transcribed it for my blog and my performance is below.

Clicking on this image leads to the article.

Judy Unger was 15 years old the first time she picked up a guitar and wrote her first original song, titled “You’re Not the One” following a recent breakup. Years later she then wrote another song for her wedding at the age of 21.  

As she started to take life more seriously and wanted to establish herself as a commercial illustrator, she thought to herself, “‘I was immature to keep singing and playing the guitar,’ so I put it aside,” she said.  

Life took its course, and she endured challenges within her marriage and faced a mother’s worst nightmare: Unger’s firstborn son, Jason, died at the age of 5 due to a severe congenital heart defect in 1992.  

“I didn’t play the guitar much, but I did play for my children, and he loved guitar. He had his own little guitar and would sing along with me,” she said, and after the death of her child, “I told myself I’d never sing again,” she added.  

But when time for the funeral came along, she found herself at a loss for words, struggling to find the right thing to say as she said farewell to her son.  

After changing a few of the lyrics to one of her original songs, she read them at the funeral.  

“I didn’t sing, I just read the words,” Unger said. “I found there was a lot of prophecy in the songs that I had written. There was a song I wrote about facing grief before I ever experienced it.”  

While still grieving she had to learn how to navigate raising her other children and also take care of her parents as they grew older and fell ill.  

Overwhelmed and trying to remain resilient, she lacked an emotional outlet until one day in 2010 when she was 50, she began to write. 

“The writing was so therapeutic … Everything poured out. I couldn’t write fast enough,” she said. “It was about telling my story to help others.”  

My daughter took pictures of me for my profile on Insight Timer. I really love how my butterfly earrings are visible on the right side.

Her guitar remained in the closet, untouched for almost 30 years, until a close friend asked her to pull it out and give it a go.  

Unger began to play “Beside Me Always” a song that became a reminder of Jason, and a comfort for her.  

She eventually began sharing her music on a free meditation app to help others who have experienced grief. Over time, she created a community of 16,000 people on the platform and every Sunday she livestreams in her room, singing songs and performing instrumentals, she said. Over 200 people tune in to watch her.  

Unger made her way to the Santa Clarita Valley for the Compassionate Friends’ local chapter 23^rd annual Candle Light Remembrance Program in December at Bethlehem SCV Church in Canyon Country.  

Unger was a part of the Compassionate Friends Woodland Hills chapter decades ago and through mutual friends she connected with SCV co-leader Diane Briones, who invited her to come and share with others.  

She performed in front of approximately 80 guests who have lost children, grandchildren and siblings too soon.  

“I was wanting my guitar playing to be immaculate,” she chuckled as she recalled the night of the ceremony during a recent phone interview. “I did a few wrong chords … but as soon as I start to play the song, I vividly can feel myself surrounded by my son … I really felt so connected to him.”   

Many of the audience members who shed tears and found comfort with other loved ones during the lighting ceremony was something that gave Unger chills, she said. “I felt every word,” she added about the songs she performed.  

“These feelings are feelings that all of them can understand … it wasn’t about being a singer. I was one of them.”  

She describes herself as a “song gardener,” saying, “My songs were like seeds planted when I was a young girl — expressions of grief I hadn’t yet experienced, but that became deeply meaningful later in life.” 

Through her music, Unger discovered a way to free herself from the “prison of grief,” she said. “I love sharing these stories with others to give them hope for healing. As a gardener, I continue to nurture these songs and help them grow.” 

“I’ll definitely come back,” she added when asked about the lighting ceremony in the SCV. “It was such a special opportunity to share my heart, my music, and my message of hope and healing.” 

To listen to Unger’s music visit: https://insighttimer.com/judyunger