HANG ON – PART 2

HANG ON THE DARK OCEAN

This story is dedicated to my vocal coach, Kimberly.

 

Click the blue links below to play my song:

Hang On Arrangement 12-20-17 Copyright 2017 by Unger

Hang On Acoustic 1-8-18 Copyright 2018 by Unger

Hang On Vocal 1-2-18 Copyright 2018 by Unger

HANG ON INSTRUMENTAL-Copyright 2014 by Judy Unger

 LINK TO PART 1 OF THIS STORY:

 

#257 HANG ON – PART 1

 

HANG ON

 

It feels so dark; the sky is gray

Nothing to live for, you cannot pray

You have no hope; is this the end?

Just take my hand; I’ll be your friend

 

I’ve been there, too – I must explain

Because I’ve suffered I feel your pain

You don’t know how you will survive

You even wonder why you’re alive

 

Hang on; love is never gone

Though it feels like night

Let love shine a light

One day, your pain will go away

Love will lift you up

Love will always stay

 

Your eyes show, your heart is broken

There’s so much pain; it’s unspoken

You’re without hope; it’s crushed your soul

There was no reason and no control

 

Hang on; strength can be drawn

Though you are numb

Do not succumb

One day, your pain will go away

Love will lift you up

Love will always stay 

 

 My wish for you is no more pain

Then just love would remain

 

Hang on for a day will dawn

Different than before

But you’ll smile once more

On that day, your pain has gone away

Love lifted you up

Love will always stay

Hang on . . . hang on . . . hang on . . .

Blue flowers? Somehow I wanted to adorn this story with images – with unusual colors. Love is beautiful and lives on. But there is no beauty when a soul is amputated.

Blue flowers? I wanted to adorn this story with images that had unusual colors. Love is beautiful and lives on. But there is no beauty when a soul is amputated. It is ugliness beyond description.

Two months ago, I began arranging my song “Hang On” for a second time. While I was working on this song, my mother’s health took a turn for the worse.

 

Two weeks before she died, I felt it was no accident that I was living through “Hang On.” My song definitely helped me cope. I imagined that “Judy of the Future” was singing my song to me.

 

I listened carefully and fully appreciated the words of, “One day your pain will go away.”

When I created this image while my mother was dying, I did not notice that the patterns on the wings resembled skulls.

When I created this image while my mother was dying, I did not notice that the patterns on the wings resembled skulls.

A year ago, I began taking lessons with Kimberly Haynes. There was no question that working with Kimberly had a huge impact upon my singing ability. I was astonished by my improvement.

 

My voice really changed and I felt compelled to redo all of my song vocals. For a year now, that has been my focus.

 

Learning about singing and vocal editing was wonderful, but tiring. At the age of 54, sometimes reality sets in and I’m not sure that my voice is good enough for my songs.  

 

I made the decision not long ago to hire Kimberly to sing this new version of Hang On. Sadly, our recording session was cancelled when she received awful news that her husband’s cancer had returned.

 

I had a lesson with her not long after that. The strain upon her was evident.

At the same time that Kimberly was meeting me to record my song at Darrin’s recording studio, we were going to practice other songs for an upcoming performance. My donation to Kulak’s Woodshed enabled me to book shows there.

Kimberly was determined that she could still perform with me. I know her intention was that it would be a wonderful opportunity for family and friends to come out and support her during this incredibly difficult time.

Kim's Kulak's flier

 

I designed a flier for her performance, which is above. What was interesting was my choice of image for the background. I liked a photo I had of an ocean with a setting sun. The irony was that I began this story with an image I have often used before for Hang On. That also incorporated a setting sun over an ocean.

For me, the darkness of an ocean with a setting sun is a metaphor for grief. The blackness reminds me of my own endless depth of pain after my child died. Floating through the waves and the current of time was also part of a parable I wrote to describe my grief journey. I named that poem “My Tears Filled an Ocean” and here is a link to it:

#142 BESIDE ME ALWAYS – PART 2

Blue rose

 

There was no question that Kimberly was starting a torturous journey through awful waves of dread. (I did not design her flier with those thoughts in mind.)

 

I sent the filer to her and she was gracious and appreciative. She did tell me that she wasn’t used to seeing her face so “large.” I let her know her large face was amazing and beautiful!

A little over a week ago, she sent me a message saying it would be best to cancel her performance.

 

Someday, I was certain Kimberly would sing a vocal for one of my songs. But it would be in the future far from now and I was not going to mention it. Perhaps this particular song would be too hard.

 

Below is a link to her blog where every entry is painful to read:

 

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/kimberlyhaynes

  

So I dedicate my song to Kimberly, whom I deeply love and care about. I dedicate my song to all of her family. I especially include Brian’s mother. My heart breaks for his mother who has already suffered the loss of another son years ago.

let love shine a light
© Judy Unger and http://www.myjourneysinsight.com 2013. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Judy Unger with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About Judy

I'm an illustrator by profession. At this juncture in my life, I am pursuing my dream of writing and composing music. Every day of my life is precious!
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3 Responses to HANG ON – PART 2

  1. jmgoyder says:

    I love everything in this post but your idea of “Judy of the future” singing to you really got to me. We are having a heat wave here so computer is to hot for the links to work – will try again when it gets cooler! Love Juliexx

    Like

    • Judy says:

      Well, Julie – you are always so supportive and I appreciate you very much. It is soon time for me to mail you a CD sharing my improvement. It is really tremendous at the age of 54 that I could follow my dream like this. I’ll mail something soon and do hope that heat wave dies down so you’re not roasting there. 🙂

      Like

      • jmgoyder says:

        I figured out how to cool the computer so may be able to access your songs soon but busy week ahead so it might be awhile. In the meantime I wish you a pillow case full of love for Christmas – Juliexxx

        Like

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