The sand and the sea. . . conjures up the driftwood prints I did when I first began my art career.

Clicking the blue link below, will play the song:


The title for this story is taken from the lyrics to an Israeli song that I used to sing called Eli, Eli.

The words “The sand and the sea” create wonderful imagery for me. At the end of this story, those images actually appeared for me while under hypnosis. 

My good and bad list:

Bad:  My mother who almost died from surgery for a broken shoulder doesn’t trust the surgeon who did the surgery. He is now telling her she needs the screws out. She needs a second opinion, so I tried to “delegate.”

Here’s my list:

1. I told her to ask my brother to set it up. She asked him.

2. I asked her primary doctor if he knew of anyone and could arrange it. He said, “I don’t know of any other shoulder specialists around. I asked her surgeon, and he doesn’t know of anyone either.”

3. I thought magically it might happen, without everyone just “dropping the ball.”

4. I thought her shoulder might be fine and her pain would go away while I was waiting.

Good: This morning, I made a phone call to a shoulder specialist, who was recommended to me by a friend of my mothers. The appointment is set!

Bad:  My mother just called. She said, “Honey, I think there’s something wrong with my telephone. It didn’t work at all when I brought it with me to an appointment.” I explained to her that a cordless phone is not a cell phone. It won’t work when it’s taken miles away. I am sad that she doesn’t understand telephones anymore.

Good:  My mother is alive and she loves me very much.

I am the youngest. I have two, older brothers but the responsibility for my parents fell upon me. I am the daughter, and that’s why.

 Email correspondence with my childhood friend, Steve:

I saw you wrote about Diane Warren in your blog. My mom was acquainted with her during mom’s time at KKBT radio. I don’t remember how they knew each other; maybe Diane was a friend with someone at the station. I think Diane’s offices were up on Sunset near the station. 

Anyways I read a lot about her at the time, I think she is quite unique in the music business, for a woman, to be such a highly, coveted songwriter and yet not a public performer and pretty much unknown to the average music listener.

Music publishing is definitely where it is at money-wise and she had her own company since the beginning and must be loaded. I can remember Mom saying how astounded she was way back then, with these immense royalty checks coming in from all over the world. This was an interview I ran across a year or so ago about her. It appealed to me, as it was very technically oriented, as to how she works.

By the way, am I the only guy here?  🙂 Steve 

Hi Steve,

Last night I googled the name Diane Warren and followed through with learning more about her. I read the part about her controlling her own “songbook” and having her own company.

I love her! Her music and lyrics are complex and simple at the same time. She is very human, and works in a very old-fashioned way. She doesn’t use a computer or anything. I have to pat myself on the back for adjusting to the digital age. It wasn’t easy for me to get on board!

I was fascinated to read about her song writing process. It was very similar to mine. You don’t have to argue about her “not being contemporary.” I think she is still very popular. She does a lot of songwriting for movies, television, and even American Idol!

As far as you being the only guy on my email list, you must know that I have been a very isolated person by being an artist. I never had to get “dressed up” to go to work. I only go food shopping. Most of my contact with other people has simply been women that I’ve played tennis with. It’s been a while since I was an art teacher.

Anyway, I’m glad you’re on my email list. Your questions are insightful. Maybe I can get more feedback from you when I’m putting my book together. I appreciate both you and your mom supporting me all the way back to the beginning! 

 “My blog title is I’M TAKING OFF”

I have cleaned up messes today from all three animals: puppy doo doo, kitty vomit, and parrot splat. How in the world did my life end up like this?

My daughter came into my studio and when she glanced at my screen she started laughing hysterically! I asked her what it was that was so funny.

She said, “Mom, I thought your blog title was, “I’M TAKING IT ALL OFF!! You had me thinking you were a stripper!”

Well that’s me; stripping off my trauma! 


At my recent hypnotherapy session, I had a lot of mind “wheel spinning” going on. I shared with Connie all the challenges I was going through with my teenage daughter. 

The current situation felt too complicated for me to possibly solve. Trying to discuss the problem solving aspect wasn’t helpful for me. It led to frustration and anguish. As usual, when I was with Connie I talked a lot. She listened well. I tried to hear whatever she told me, because it was always helpful.

Eventually, all the wheel spinning became tiring. I decided I could just “hold off” on finding a solution to the situation. Sometimes, time did reveal things to me that I couldn’t understand presently.

I felt a lot of conflict because I had opened up and wrote a lot about all of the many challenges I’ve faced with my children. Especially for my daughter, she was shy and would not have wanted me to write about her. Even though I had changed her name, people would still know she was my daughter. How could I possibly solve this problem?

Initially I believed I wanted to reveal what was so challenging in my life. I had the thought that perhaps it might help others. The fact that I shared so much had me feel like I was selfish. I had taken care of so many people for such a long time. By writing all of my feelings, it was a way of doing something for myself.

After I said that, I realized that the word selfish was not really a helpful word.

I told Connie, “Okay, I am trying to heal myself; perhaps at my childrens’ expense. I hope the result will still be positive someday. I hope someday all of my children will understand that I was healing and will forgive me for sharing so many personal things.”

During hypnosis, I relaxed and floated off. Somewhere in the clouds her voice said to me, “Can you see anything that is comforting in your situation right now?” Is there some image that you can find to help you get through all this?”

An image came to me. It was so clear. It was amazing. I felt like I was there. Here was what I told her.

“I am sitting facing my daughter. We are on a patio overlooking the ocean at a villa, somewhere in Italy perhaps. It is ten years from now. I am very, very rich. We are traveling through Europe. Did you know I’ve hardly gone anywhere? I have never had a vacation that’s relaxing. It’s a beautiful day. There is an aqua ocean in the distance. It is sunny, and she and I are enjoying our trip together.”

I continued to describe my vision to Connie.

“My daughter looks confident and beautiful,” I said. “She is laughing and enjoying her life. She is amazed that my promise that I’d be successful actually happened. She didn’t believe it!”

 © Judy Unger and 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Judy Unger with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About Judy

I'm an illustrator by profession. At this juncture in my life, I am pursuing my dream of writing and composing music. Every day of my life is precious!
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