YOU BROUGHT ME SUNSHINE

Today was the 20th anniversary of the death of my five-year-old son, Jason. I prefer to update my blog with some very meaningful correspondence.

I also want to share two special songs at the end of this post. My soon to be released audio book will be named “Beside Me Always” in honor of Jason.

 

Message from my high school choir teacher, Frankie Nobert: (My words are in blue)

 

Dear Judy,

 

What beautiful writing there is in your blog, and how wonderful that you had the day at the restaurant and at the apartment to pick up boxes. So often there is a message in each encounter, if one is open to it.  Your new Russian friend is right that you are going to love being in your new space, even though it will be smaller.

 

Much love, Frankie

She and I texted a lot last night. I found out she was Hungarian.

 

It was such a beautiful exchange and she said she would love to hear my music and audio book (I am mailing her some CD’s). She asked me to correct her English – because her comment on my blog had a few grammatical errors.

 

I really believe in messages from encounters – you are so right. I think that is what inspired me to write. Writing is amazing. It crystallizes the important things for me out of the drudge. Only certain things stand out for me to write about – and the more profound the message – the better!

 

Today is the 20th anniversary of Jason’s death and I am feeling fine with it – that is amazing for me. In only 5 more days, I’ll have my other eye repaired. Things are definitely moving forward in a good way now. Thank you as always, Frankie, for taking the time to share in the details of my life.

 

Love, Judy

TO MY DEAREST FRIEND JUDY,

I REMEMBER VERY WELL YOUR PHONE CALL 2O YEARS AGO AT MY OFFICE WHEN I WAS SPEECHLESS. JUST CRYING AND YOU TRIED  TO COMFORT ME W/A CALM VOICE, SUCH A BRAVE AND WONDERFUL FRIEND YOU ARE. I AM GLAD THE END OF THE TUNNEL IS CLOSE…

SMALLER SPACE AND LESS MONEY FOR FREEDOM AND PEACE OF MIND IS A GOOD EXCHANGE….I LOVE YOU AND I’LL KEEP IN TOUCH W/YOU FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE

BEAUTIFUL PICTURES!     MAGDA

 

Your friendship continues to bless me, Magda.

 

I believe it was the process of creating my book and singing songs about Jason that healed me. I will never forget the anguish, but today I was calm and celebrated how many good things there are in my life. Knowing how you struggle bravely with your MS, inspires me to stay positive. I am grateful for my health every day because of knowing what you go through, my dear friend.

 

I love you, too, for the rest of my life.

 

Judy

A painting of mine that depicts sunshine. All four of my children have brought sunshine into my life.

 

Below I share a text message exchange: (I included all those sweet abbreviations that my children make fun of me for)

 

Hi Kris,

It’s Judy – (I bought your boxes). I did write about u today on my blog. thanks so much again for your reassurance & boxes! Judy

 

Oh, I will read it!! Thank u so much!!! You are such a nice person!!

 

Ditto to you, too. Good luck with your new life! J

 

You too!! Let’s keep in touch. J

 

Ok! Feel free to leave a comment on my blog. Let me know if u would like me to share a cd of my music with u.

 

Definitely!

 

I can mail it. Send me your full name & address whenever u would like one.

 

Here is my address. . .My name is spelled Krisztina. I am reading ur blog right now. Pls send me ur cd and thank you! I am sure I will enjoy it. J

 

I will & I’m honored. My fav song for us is called “the unknown.” I haven’t shared that one yet on my blog.

 

OMG! I’m just reading ur blog. I love it! Can’t wait to hear that song. J

 

It’s coming. I’ll mail it tomorrow. My audio book is large. I’ll send u one cd of it and the music. U made my night. Kiss your son for me.

 

Thank you so much! I just made a comment on ur blog! Can’t wait to listen to your songs!! XOXO

 

I am burning it 4 u now. thank u so much & I’m going to read your comment right now!

 

I made a mistake on my comment. Can I correct it? I said write instead of read.

 

That’s funny. I just corrected it. I can save u the trouble.

 

Thank you so much!! My English is not perfect, anyway I am from Hungary.

 

Oh that’s it. I loooove your accent! Your English is good & it will get better. Is it ok if I share some of our messages from last nite? It was such a sweet exchange! How r u? I am ok & did not cry today.

 

Hi! Yes sure, you can share it J I was ok today. I am glad u didn’t cry! It’s so hard to believe you cry u look so happy.

 

I am happy, but I cry when I remember certain losses in my life like my son 20 years ago. Right now the harder part is going thru the death of my marriage. U understand that – I know! I am staying positive & that helps.

 

I like to cry sometimes, it helps to feel better after. You are gonna be just fine. I am sure u will find a perfect partner for yourself. Because u deserve it and you suffered enough.

 

I am actually excited about being alone. I just woke up one day & decided to risk it all. I have never been with another man & got married very young. So it is scary to imagine being with someone else, but I am open to it if it’s the right person.

 

I am really sorry about the sad anniversary. You are not just wonderful, but so strong, too!

 

I am not sad anymore. My son was a gift and is always beside me forever. I appreciate your thinking of me. Xoxo

a

While I was packing, I came across the handwritten sheets where I had revised some lyrics to my songs before Jason’s funeral twenty years ago. I share them here:

 

These sheets were only preliminary revisions. I noticed the line that I could not sing. That was true and I didn’t sing for many years.

© Judy Unger and http://www.myjourneysinsight.com 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Judy Unger with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About Judy

I'm an illustrator by profession. At this juncture in my life, I am pursuing my dream of writing and composing music. Every day of my life is precious!
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2 Responses to YOU BROUGHT ME SUNSHINE

  1. Rena Fisher says:

    Wow, 20 years! Unbelievable.  He was such a bright, happy little boy.

    ________________________________

    Like

  2. 20 years… incredible to think of that time having passed since 1992. Love these pictures – such joy. x

    Like

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