ANOTHER YOU – PART 3

Clicking the blue links below will play my song:

ANOTHER YOU #3 INSTRUMENTAL

ANOTHER YOU-5/3/15 Copyright 2015 by Judy Unger

My world was becoming blurrier and when I wore glasses I often felt like I was on the other side of a dirty window. I wished I could just open that window! I never liked wearing glasses and could hardly see out of them. On Friday, I played tennis with glasses on for the first time in my life. My perception was so altered that I could not get my serves to go in. As ball after ball looped out, I laughed and then cursed.

 

Inside, I wished that it were time to go home.

 

Occasionally, I felt overwhelming sadness but I countered it with the joy I received when hearing my music. Sometimes, I pretended I was a conductor and swung my arms through the air while listening to my newest song recording. I played it over and over, as often as I could. When I wasn’t physically listening, I could still hear the song’s beautiful notes resonating through me.

 

I had wanted an arrangement of my song “Another You” that truly captured my emotion. It was one of the first songs I arranged with George and although I did a second version – neither one moved me. But now, my newest version of “Another You” was so sweet that I felt tears well up when listening to it. I had composed “Another You” when I was 19 for my friend, Cheryl, when we were both in college.

 

The timing was interesting; Cheryl’s birthday was in August and I always thought of her then. Five years had gone by since she died of breast cancer. This year, she would have been 53. It was time for me to call her mother; an anniversary of the heart was the perfect time to let her mom know how Cheryl was still deep within my heart.

 

I had promised Cheryl that I would always stay in touch with her mother. The last time I had called, her mother was definitely discouraged about life. I was concerned about her and hoped things had improved since the last time we spoke.

 

As I was thinking about making that call, my daughter knocked on my door. She had her best friend visiting her; she had known her most of her life. Seeing their joy was so beautiful that it caused a lump to form in my throat.

 

After my daughter went out of the room, it was very quiet. I was sad and suddenly heard Cheryl’s voice in my mind. I always loved hearing Cheryl’s voice and realized I missed her so much.

 

She said, “Oh Judy, I am so sorry for what you are going through. I can feel your sadness and loneliness.” With her words, tears began to pour from my eyes. The droplets swelled and then cascaded down to my neck. I closed my eyes and tried to regain my composure. She was right; I was lonely. It occurred to me that there was no person I really enjoyed spending time with anymore. I simply preferred to be alone. I wondered if it would always be that way.

 

But then, Cheryl’s words were like a warm and comforting hug. She spoke softly and said, “Jude, you will have beautiful days again. I know it and you know it, too. It will be with someone who adores and understands you. But more than that, you will feel joyful and time will be precious with that person. When that happens, you will remember my words. The memory of love never leaves.”

 

I began to cry softly. My chest heaved silently and I shook. I believed her.

Traveling back in time – 32 years ago. Clicking on this makes it larger.

A few days later, I called Cheryl’s mother, Blanch. I was relieved when she answered the phone. There was a lot of catching up to do. I shared many things with her and she was supportive. It was interesting for me to hear that she was not surprised about my impending divorce; she said she knew I had been unhappy for a long time.

I loved hearing that Cheryl’s children were doing beautifully; her oldest daughter had recently become engaged. It was one of those “life moments” and I felt a pang imagining what it meant for Cheryl to be gone from her daughter’s life.

 

I hadn’t realized that Blanch had recently celebrated a milestone birthday – she was 90 years old and her family had made her a party. Before I hung up, I let her know that Cheryl was always in my heart. Blanch said she knew I had called because Cheryl’s birthday was approaching.

 

Blanch said she wanted to give me some advice. I listened as she said, “You know, I never want to bring any of my family down. So I hide my tears and cry when I’m alone. It’s very important to go on living and protect those you love from the sadness.”

 

Of course, I understood that well. I had survived that way and eventually the tears stopped. Yet looking back, living in a zombie mode wasn’t really living – but it was certainly better than feeling the anguish.

 

I told Blanch that I never expected I would find so much joy through my music and writing.

 

And Cheryl would always be with me, too.

A picture of Cheryl during one of our sleepovers – I love these cute pajamas!

Cheryl was my maid of honor when I got married.

I met Cheryl at a college retreat named BCI. I am playing my guitar in this picture for a performance during that retreat.

This picture is with two other good friends, Janet on the left and Linda in the center.

I remember when this picture was taken. It was after my bridal shower at Cheryl’s house.

This picture was taken during a family vacation in Carpinteria. Cheryl and I were 19 at that time.

 ANOTHER YOU

Copyright 2010 by Judy Unger

 

Here I am writing to you,

When I know you’ve heard these words before

now there’s so much more,

And it’s mostly left unsaid

And here I am singing to you,

When I know that you’ve heard every song

But this one is lifelong; the music is forever

 

I know if I search my whole life through

I’ll never find another you

I could search and search my memories, too

I’ll never find, I’ll never find another you

 

Here I am dreaming of you

Wishing I could tell you so many things

But then the memory brings a smile

And you are with me now

Here I am shining to you

And I can’t believe what’s happened to me

All the joy is there to see

and what you would have wanted

 

I know if I search my whole life through

I’ll never find another you

I could search and search my memories, too

And I’ll never find, I’ll never find another you

I’ll never find another you

Even if I search my whole life through

I’ll never find another you

Even if I search my whole life through

© Judy Unger and http://www.myjourneysinsight.com 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Judy Unger with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About Judy

I'm an illustrator by profession. At this juncture in my life, I am pursuing my dream of writing and composing music. Every day of my life is precious!
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1 Response to ANOTHER YOU – PART 3

  1. Sharon Fisch says:

    Your beautiful blog touched me so much. Keep up your blog, with the beautiful memories you have in your heart.

    Like

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