Click the blue link to play my song

(which has been changed to my heart, in first person):

MUSIC FROM MY HEART

One day, she began to play

Silence turned to song; it was the start

That day, sadness went away

And she was healed

With music from her heart

She thought she’d always mourn,

trauma from her past

But when she was reborn, healing came at last

So many tears she’d cry, she did grieve

So many years went by, she didn’t believe

Sorrow would leave . . .

CHORUS

When she began to write, she felt so alive

She found her insight; she didn’t just survive

She sang and her tears dried, no one guessed

About her pain inside, she expressed

She was blessed . . .

CHORUS

 With grief there was no sound, and it would seem

joy she had finally found

hope became her theme

now she could dream . . .

She was sad for so long,

now her life was filled with song

One day, she began to play

Silence turned to song; it was the start

All her sadness went away

She was healed

With music from her heart

music from her heart . . .

When I write song lyrics, I go through stacks of paper scrawling all the possibilities.

WHAT MY SONGS MEAN TO ME

My songs are momentary interludes that caress my soul.

My songs elevate the mundane and ordinary into something uplifting and ethereal.

My songs allow me to float away to another place.

My songs soothe me and remove all elements of stress from my life.

My songs are stories and each one is unique. Some are like “time machines” for me; they transport me back to my youth. Others tell a story about my life and I experience all of the same emotions I felt when I wrote the song.

My songs have music and words that came into my head and heart in a way that I do not completely understand. Sometimes the beauty of the process overwhelms me.

My songs take away my pain. Even sad songs, allow pain to “flow out of my heart” with their haunting melody.

My songs were something “heavy” before I was able to rediscover them this year. Now each song created represents “lightness.” The creation of a song leaves an empty space that will be filled with further creations that are possibly even more beautiful.

My songs are gifts. They were always there, and I was given a gift that I am simply sharing.

My songs allow me to express emotions through singing that are unlike any other form of expression. Most people understand emotions such as crying or laughing. However, the emotional expression of singing is unlike anything else for me.

When I sing my songs, I really do feel like my lyrics soar while my heart explodes!

“A melody became the start”

Over this past month, a new song began to emerge from inside of me. Despite all the challenges bombarding me (including physical pain from the burn on my arm), my creative explosion continued. If ever I needed something to “caress my soul” and “uplift me” this song was it! 

For such a long time, I assumed my “theme song” was the melody to my instrumental song, Farewell. I was glad to replace that melody with this one. It was very fitting for me to have a “new” theme song that conveys so much joy! 

I have shared some preliminary recordings of my “emerging song,” but with this post my song has its full arrangement now. 

I am also ready to share the story behind my “theme song.” My song, “Music From Her Heart,” emerged at a time when I had no expectations that there were any more songs from the past left for me to reinvent. 

Although I didn’t include this line of lyrics that I scrawled, it really was about how a “melody became the start.” I am sharing part of a voice lesson clip where I sang only the melody for my voice teacher, Peaches. I wondered what lyrics would “unfold for me.

Just like my last two songs (No Words For You and You Were There), the lyrics flowed out of me as if they were already written.

PEACHES LESSON 3/11/11 MUSIC FROM HER HEART

“It was comfort”

On my book’s introduction I wrote a simple explanation about why I gave up music for thirty years.

“Suddenly, the emotional music felt so empty as I embarked upon a time of responsibility and isolation. My deep friendships ended. I was now married, and my art career became my focus. All of the emotions that had fueled my songwriting were gone. It seemed more and more awkward to play music, and eventually my guitar became dusty and unused.”

All of my songs and the corresponding memories have now been peeled back like the layers on an onion. I could not access what was deep below until everything on top was first removed.

It was easy for me to relearn the songs where I had an old, cassette recording of them. Once I finished relearning those songs, all I had left were ten sheets of lyrics and chords with only a partial memory of how those songs went.

I had thought that the last song I composed before giving up my music was my wedding song, which I renamed “Together.”

But then I remembered that the song named, “Comfort,” was actually the very last song I composed before giving up music for thirty years.

I’ve been asked many times why the words and/or chords of an old song were more inspiring for me to “reinvent.” I have also wondered why I haven’t felt the desire to compose a completely, new song.

Simply remembering an old melody was a challenge for me. I believe that with the memory of an old melody, came wonderful feelings transporting me back to my youth. Certainly, the melody to “Music From Her Heart,” (originally named “Comfort”) was a very comforting and “catchy,” chorus melody. It was so joyful that it inspired me to write lyrics surrounding my “transformation.”

The timing was fantastic and it allowed me to give my book a title and a song to go with it!

I was transported back in time with a memory about my newest song.

I remembered the isolation of working as an artist and how I still had musical moments even as the melodies began to fade from my life.

Prior to having children, I would be painting all day long. Sometimes I felt lonely while my husband was at work. Occasionally, I still picked up my guitar, but became frustrated because my technical virtuosity was slipping away due to lack of practice.

I was gradually losing my “repertoire” and the thought of repetition to relearn the complex, classical guitar pieces was overwhelming for me. The truth was that I was actually tired of playing them. Playing classical guitar was very demanding and my standards were high.

I remembered being lonely one afternoon. I picked up my guitar and composed a catchy melody that I could not stop humming.

I was so excited that I even called my illustration teacher and mentor, Nancy and sang my tune over the telephone!

I never found adequate lyrics for my “catchy tune” or developed it into a complete song. The few lyrics I wrote were sweet, even though they didn’t rhyme well. I ended up using a lot of “la la la’s” to fill in the gaps. The last verse was perhaps the best; where I thought everything would be all right if I were holding my guitar.

The experience had me so frustrated with songwriting that I never wrote another song. After almost thirty years, my song is finally finished!

An old song sheet with the song I named “Comfort.” It was the very last song I composed – probably when I was twenty-two years old.

On 4/10/11 Judy wrote:

Hi Nanc! 

I hope you know that you are definitely part of my journey – big time! 

By the way, I wrote a new song that carries the title of my book. I am going to record it soon and when I do I can’t wait to share it with you. I still remember humming the melody to you over the phone when I was first illustrating. Do you remember how we used to talk on the phone for hours back then? 

I guess I remember the whole thing because it was really funny to play my guitar into a telephone. I never did that before or since! 

Love, Jude 

Hi Jude!

Yes, I do remember talking for hours with you while we worked. Isn’t that funny?

You worked with me through many drawings. 

It’s different now. I am more focused when I work on the computer. When I worked in pen and ink, it was during the rendering that we talked. I love thinking about that process and our talks. 

Perhaps when I hear the song you sang to me, it will come back, very sweetly, I’m sure. I hope your arm heals quickly.

Love Nan XXX 

On 4/17/11 Judy wrote: 

Hi Nancy, I’m attaching my new, “theme song.” I’m very excited about it – it’s my baby! 

Oh, Judy,

I’m sooooo happy for you. It’s like you have been freed from a prison of fear. How brave you are. Oh, that I could be so brave. 

It’s as if your pain is changed to joy.

Thank you for leading me closer to taking the step myself. 

Love Nan XXX 

Dearest Nancy,

I’ve thought about this. If I had to choose whether I could touch a lot of people in a small way or a few people in a big way – I’d choose the latter. 

I am very inspired knowing I’ve touched you. Keep taking those steps, Nanc. It’s never too late. Don’t give up hope! 

For me, bravery was so worth it to find joy. Your prison might be one of fear – but I think mine was of grief. Thank god, I am free. I look forward to the rest of my life now. 

It’s amazing that I wrote the melody to my “theme song”  twenty-eight years ago and I shared it with you! 

Love you so much, Jude 

Dear Judy,

Thanks for your thoughtful reply. Your emails are always so sincere. Your grief must have been unimaginable to have stolen so many years. 

I so desperately want to more freely express my ideas and feelings. But you are right, Judy. I will never give up. Your words are so encouraging. They give me new hope. Thank you!

Love Nan XXX 

Oh Nancy, I got teary reading your message. 

If I could make a wish . .  

It would be for you to experience what I have. I never believed it would happen. I am glad I held onto hope, even though it seemed unimaginable. 

If I inspire you not to give up hope, than I feel like I’ve succeeded beyond anything I’ve ever done in my life. 

Love you, Judy

© Judy Unger and http://www.myjourneysinsight.com 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Judy Unger with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.